Breathe in, Breathe out

Surpassing all troubles in life made me believe that I was strong. Strong enough to move forward, forget yesterday and just look forward to tomorrow. But sometimes, when life gets really difficult to deal with, and it leaves you with no choice, all you can really do is sit down, calm yourself and your heart, hold back tears, listen to good music, close eyes, breathe in and breathe out, and hope that you could be stronger, just a little more.

13 years ago

13 years ago, my parents chose to let go of the love that once bonded the both of them. At a very young age, I understood infidelity.  But I had to believe that the love they once shared was true. It was just lost somewhere. I was a kid and yet, I had a different version of the word "pain". 13 years ago, I lost my reason to get out of bed everyday.

It has been 13 years and today, the person who ruined my "home", the person who broke the solid foundation of my mom and dad's love, the person who stole my chance of having a complete family, the person who caused me so much pain -- decided to talk to me. And yet, not even a single "I'm sorry." 

But today, I am letting go because I know that even though some families aren't together under a single roof, the pureness of love from our parents can always fight storms and will forever reign. 

Hello, 2013!

Today I welcome 2013 with a happy and hopeful heart and a renewed soul. I had broken dreams and failed resolutions last year but it's never too late to turn them into reality. Never too late to travel the world. Never too late to showcase what I'm capable of doing. Never too late to forgive and forget. Most especially, never too late to hope for a better tomorrow.

Today, I am bidding farewell of everything that burdens me. I choose to be happy for friends who clinch not to keep in touch. I choose to stop complaining about work as I'm being paid with good amount anyway. I choose to understand why people have to leave. I choose to accept that life is a roller coaster and I gotta enjoy the ride.

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!! :)

Last Friday for 2012

I am finally freeing myself of all the agony and discomfort 2012 has brought me. I will because beyond all, I know I've been showered with so much blessings. And I choose to hold on to all those wonderful things. I am trying to forgive. I am trying to be patient. I know I fail a lot of people but deep down, I know I am trying to be better. At the end of a long and tiring day, we all just want to be reminded that we need to carry on because life's being life and we gotta have to fight a little more.  

My 21st..

 Peaceful time with my family was all I wanted for my 21st. But as the saying goes, life doesn't always turn out the way you want it to be. It may not be what I originally wanted, but it was way beyond better. Thanks to my fab fam and friends who exerted effort in making my 21st special.

This year has been a roller coaster ride. I was on top for some time then suddenly I realized I was at my lowest point. Most of the time I was in the middle of diversity. I have hopes and desires that I choose to keep inside me. I hurt a lot of people. I learned how to forgive and move forward. I learned how to be happy with little things.

I know I got a lot of learning to make. I still have dreams that I need to chase. Love that I am looking forward to share with someone, someday. I still have to aspire bigger things for my family. Patience that I need to showcase for people around me. Happiness to share with friends.

Though I still have a lot of learning to do, I am grateful that I have family and friends who choose to love me even when I'm up, down, or in between.

To be better..

Bothered, confused, frustrated -- this is all me for the last couple of weeks. And I still am today. But the thing is, I'm trying to be better. And I guess that's the thing that matters, that from every pain and disappointments I receive everyday, I still stand and continue to face everyday with the desire of being better inside my heart. Maybe I couldn't be better in a day, or in a week or even in a year but I know I'm making progress day by day. That's all that matters. Because with every single step that I make, I might just be able to look back one day and say "I'm better now".

Dreams

People may be a lot different from one another but at the end of a long and tiring day, we all want the same things, admit it or not, that is to love and be loved back. May it be someone special or love from family. Whatever it is. Sometimes, when it seems like this is quite impossible to happen, atleast not yet, God is making it happen on our dreams. Not to make us feel that it won't ever happen. But he gives us a glimpse of how wonderful it is to experience the magic and spark of being loved. He allows us to foresee the possibilities that life will be showering us in the future.

So I'll hold on. I'll wait. I don't know how much time and patience do I still have to showcase but I will be reserving a very special space for that someone, in God's time. :)